Things As They Really Are

Last week I went to a FIRESIDE.  This is a big step for Kristen Gibb.  I quit going to those a long time ago because I was so fed up with being told to get married.  I swear that is the only topic they ever, EVER talk about.  Anyways, I won't get into that.  


This fireside was GREAT!  President Carter from the South Stake was the speaker.  Wow, he is a funny old man.  He spoke to us on the top four temptations for LDS men and women.  Just in case you're interested, here they are:


TOP FOUR FOR GUYS:
4.  Being Lazy And Apathetic
3.  Forgetting Past Spiritual Experiences
2.  (? not sure on this one)  Needing To Be Told What To Do.
1.  Wasting Time And Money On Leisure


TOP FOUR FOR GIRLS:
4.  Criticizing Priesthood Leaders
3.  Living In Fantasy Worlds
2.  Gossiping
1.  Not Having Regular, Deep Scripture Study


President Carter was very entertaining in his delivery of each temptation.  The chapel erupted in laughter a few times, but none of those occasions were as loud as the time we laughed at his explanation for temptation number 3 for the women.


No idea what it means to "Live in a Fantasy World"?  Let me help you out.

I can hear you now, "EDWARD IS REAL KRISTEN!! SCREW YOU!!"

Definitely saw some girls I lifeguarded with this summer absolutely mesmerized by this series.

This ones even got it's own TV Series.  That makes it even more real right?

Have you guessed where this is going yet? 

SERIOUSLY LADIES?!?  ARE WE FOR REALS?????

Alright.  Let's not pretend that these books are being read because they're superior pieces of literature, because we all know that they're not.  They are an escape.  They are fantasy worlds.  They are places we run and hide in when things just aren't as peachy in the real world.  

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE READING, and I respect people who opt to read before other mind numbing forms of leisure.  But, when what you're reading gets in the way of the every day, gives you fantastic ideas about how relationships with the opposite sex should be like, and basically leaves you living a life of cognitive dissonance, what you're reading is crap and you have a problem.

Is your life a constant woeful let down in regards to guys?  It's probably because you need to stop looking for Edward or Jacob.  Although Stephanie Meyer has convinced you that being a grumpy and monotone zombie is all it takes to attract these wonderful specimens, things don't work that way.  Boys usually aren't attracted to girls who don't smile or seem completely void of personality.  Please girls, find (or realize and accept) your own real-life romantic counterpart, understand his follies and foibles, and realize that skin that sparkles and locomotive-like strength DO NOT EXIST.  Have you ever stopped and wondered what it would be like if the roles were reversed and the only thing every guy in the world could talk about was Bella Swan or some fictitious female?  You'd probably think he was retarded.  It's a miracle every guy hasn't given up on the female race.  

Step out of the book ladies and be the heroine.  Earn your own respect and praise by getting an A on a super hard midterm, complimenting someone you've been meaning to, or just being a remarkably virtuous woman.  Come back to the real world and do everything in your power to make your life something worth reading, because if you think about it, it will be pretty depressing when you're 90 and realize the highlights of your life were reading about someone else's life that didn't even exist.